The Worst Place in Texas

Here I have shared a reflection on my first visit to Texas Death Row and the emotions I experienced seeing the humanity of the men there and the inhumane way Death Row inmates are treated, and coming to understand the many problems in the "justice" system which has placed countless innocent men and women in prison and on Death Row.

Recommended actions: Support The Innocence Project and help exonerate Innocent people: http://www.innocenceproject.org/get-involved/10-things-anyone-can-do-to-help-exonerate-innocent-people-and-prevent-wrongful-convictions

Also, abolish the Death Penalty so that no more innocent people will face execution, and change the way we react to murder cases to reflect real justice rather than a need for a conviction, and the prevalence of emotional trials with little evidence or logic.

Recommended topics for discussion: Solitary confinement for death row inmates. Wrongful convictions. Impact of prison and lack of contact on families and loved ones of inmates.

The Worst Place in Texas

        We are late getting to Hell. My ride was leaving a meeting, and we had to stop for gas. We pass through the guard station where the barely-literate have so much power.They didn't even search me; the privilege of light skin and being unknown to these walls. I leave my personality behind and enter only carrying 25 dollars in quarters, and the state sponsored identification.

"Take off your shoes.

How old are you?

Walk through.

Show me your feet."

A hand swipes under my breasts,

"How old are you?"

        We pass through to the juxtaposition of double barbed wire fences, rocks,and a line of chrysanthemums cared for by modern slaves, and never to be seen by the prisoners I will visit. Oh, the sweet irony of beauty in Hell. It has the white walled hallways and poorly cleaned bathrooms of a school building.Guards passing through making us avert our gaze, and above me the walls read, "Do the right thing"--not exactly what I'd expect.

       They buzz us in and I find you behind glass-- you are a caged bird, with broad features and a crooked but shining smile. The telephone reveals a youthful voice. Despite everything you are happy; despite everything, we are here together, and we will talk until they take one of us away.

Just two hours. 

We talk of life honestly.

We talk of love and pain,

fun and work,

and the tragedies of your past and mine.

The lies they told to put you here,

and of politics, books, friends, and lovers.

        When I leave we do the cliche goodbyes. I wish only that I could melt this glass like butter, to touch you the way we touch each others' hearts with words. The way friends are meant to embrace.And leaving you here feels like such a betrayal; I don't want to leave a friend to die. I can't stand leaving you to die. The tears behind my eyes make me burn with rage, but I hold them back because You are the one who can not leave.

        Then you went back to your Hell, to be strip searched and locked in your cage, and I went to wait at Walmart.That night, on the drive home, we heard a man got away with murder. He murdered a black child. But the jury said there was "reasonable doubt". I want to know, where's the reasonable doubt for you? Hanging in the DNA evidence they destroyed or never viewed? Hidden in the lies they told at your trial? Or below the surface of the black skin that was all they cared to see?

        The only thing I have reasonable doubt in is the system that created Hell on this Earth. And I know I would run into a burning fire for anyone I care about, so I knew then I would keep walking into this Hell for you. You are my friend and my brother, and you don't deserve to live or die this way.

I won't leave you to die, my friend.